Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Shameless-Product-Placement-and-Racism Course

This is a by-the-book buddy cop movie and that is not a compliment.

When I say by-the-book, I mean they just took the bare bones buddy cop template and slapped Jay Leno into it. I've seen some crappy buddy cop movies (*cough*NationalSecurity*cough*), but they were still comedy gold compared to this Jay-Leno-as-a-Cop-Thinking-He's-Funny bull crap. And the racism, wow! It wasn't relevant to anything, it was just kinda awkward.

I was really hoping that Mr. Miyagi would bring something interesting to the table (kinda like what Jackie Chan did for Rush Hour), but nope. He just decides to help enforce the racial stereotype for the rest of the dumbass story. Though I have to admit the last scene of this movie was pretty epic. As I'm watching it unfold I'm like, "There's no way he's going to do what I think he's gonna do", and then he totally does it.

[Spoilers!] A friggin flying kick into the windshield of a car barreling down the alley, but instead of bouncing off and flying around like a rag doll he busts through the glass and obliterates the bad guy's head WTF![End Spoilers]

It was so ridiculous that it did a flying kick into the realm of awesomeness. But even that level of awesome cannot save this movie from oblivion, where it belongs.

I give this movie 1 Banzai out of 5 (just because of the epic ending).

Our lispy star and sidekick for this abomination.
If anyone reading out there plans on watching this, DON'T!
And if you insist on watching it do yourself a favor and skip to the only good part of this movie: the end.



  1. You said it all man. By the book indeed, but that was an epic ending, no doubt about that.
    Awesome pic dude. However you were a bit generous with Leno's (barf) physique.
    I always barf when I say Leno (barf). Go team Coco.

  2. My bad, I should have totally given him a beer gut! I also wanted to make his eyes face in the opposite direction of each other, but it looked weird rather than funny so I made him stare off into space instead.

  3. You have to be a bad ass to drop-kick someone's face through the windshield of a moving vehicle; it's like a prerequisite or something. :P